// earphones on; now playing: Love Is //

Deleted my old blog which has 500++ followers; cause I think my life is happy enough. I only throw when I’m down but since you came in my life, my life is more than happy. But, not now. Literally, I’ve saved in my calendar until our 3^rd anniversary but now I have to delete it. & I’ve no idea why can’t my phone delete your number in my contacts. Well, I’ve promised myself not to cry but I just can’t. My tears keep falling every sec, my bed is always wet. I’ve no idea why a simple misunderstood between us could break us apart. My life is so messed up now. I’ve tonnes of problems in my head causing me to get migraine every sec & there’s no one who I can share with. You know you might be questioning why I asked for a break up. I was so messed up, you’ve been disappeared for 24/7 without any news. It’s been a week that I have a really bad flu & cough, I can’t even say a word cause my throat hurt so badly. I’ve many problems stucked in my head, I’m damn tired everyday & I go back at 6pm everyday because of the Japan school thingy. Where were you when I needed you?  & Suddenly that night I suffered from a really bad migraine, a really bad flu, cough, sore throat till my nose was bleeding non stop. Suddenly I was so stupid that I texted you & ask for a break up when you’re the person who I needed the most that time. I’ve straight fallen asleep. I woke up at 6 to your “agree break up text”. You know that kind of feeling when suddenly you woke up & ……………….., it’s like half a part of me, died. You think that you’re a burden to me? You think that leaving me would make me any happier? Would make me more focus on my studies? NO. But I’m the one who made the rush decision & you’re agreed. There’s nothing I can do about it anymore. Remember our promises? Remember your promises? That is now only memories. Thank you so much, Thanks for your presence that made my life more merrier, Thanks for being the only one bestfriend who understands me,  Thanks because you could stand my attitude but now you can’t right? Um yeah thank you, Thanks for being with me this 723 days, Thanks for making me believe there is someone who loves me, Thanks for the shirts you gave me (well im wearing it rn actually he he), Thanks for everything. It’s not what I want, It’s what that have been written. I’ve never love someone like how I loved you. I’ve promised that you are my first & last. There is never gonna be someone who will & could replace you, I promise………

 My life is fucking messed up, I’m just waiting for my turn to die